Breathe Me
by JayMayLay
Summary: 'But then she laughed, and the darkness that was contaminating my mind, and clouding up my thoughts was annihilated.' RxB FEMSLASH [Discontinued]
1. Prologue

Breathe Me : Prologue.

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Her hair was a deep shade of brown, the richest, most luxurious shade I'd ever had the pleasure of seeing. Her silky tendrils were an elaborate mixture of multiple different hues, from a deep, warm mahogany, to the slightest hints of red; they all contributed to what I knew was the most beautiful hair I'd ever see in my long life.

Her lips were a cupids bow, plump and rounded - soft and delectable. Whether smiling or frowning, they shaped perfectly into the most tantalizing sight. A wonderful cherry pink - and they contrasted greatly with the pale porcelain of her godly clear skin.

I entertained the idea that I was dreaming - but then I was abruptly brought back to reality… I couldn't dream; I was incapable of anything of the sort. I swiftly forced my attention back to the dazzling beauty before me, and continued to roam over the perfection that was -- well, I didn't know her name, but I assumed it was something equally beautiful and elegant as she.

My thoughts flickered, and I asked myself when I had become so eloquent and worshipping in my description of something. I'd never had the care to bother gazing at a human with detail before, and now that I was, I was thinking of her in such a way that it was sickening for me to realise. I sounded like a loved up, salivating mortal, and it caused me to shudder in repulsion. Not just repulsion, but bitterness. I was supposed to be 'the fairest of them all' .. Yet this frail, breakable little girl was leaving me rather short on what to do,

I - Rosalie Lillian Hale- was _ogling_ the one thing that I was supposed to digest! It was demeaning, degrading, and most of all, it left me perplexed as to why this unsuspecting human held such allure for me.

But then she laughed, and the darkness that was contaminating my mind, and clouding up my thoughts was annihilated. The sound of crystal clear chimes resonated, and I felt a tug in my chest - an unexplainable desire to be closer to the living, breathing creature in front of me. It was my desire to see more of this girl, and quench the curiosity that she had caused to overtake every fibre of my being at that precise moment.

Perhaps I approached her because I thought that maybe it would stop be from being so entirely infatuated with her - once I saw that I _was_ much better than her… That indeed, this unimportant girl held flaws, imperfections that I lacked. Perhaps I thought that it would bate the nervous ringing in my ears.

I know not, but I walked toward her, and I felt something I'd never felt before this moment within my entire existence. I felt that unfamiliar feeling humans described as butterflies. I was nervous. I was anxious over approaching a lowly human being!

I was ashamed of myself, but I was also entirely set on approaching this young girl, and so I did. With each step, my breathing increased in it's tempo, and I actually felt it necessary to stop for a moment to gather my composure.

_Disgusting_, I thought to myself. But I continued, and all too soon I was standing before her, barely knowing what my plan of action was. So I kneeled, coming to her level. I ran my fingers over the grass that she was sitting on, and smiled, looking into her eyes - that prior to this moment I hadn't noticed. If her hair was a dazzling mixture of warmth, then her eyes would be endless, expressive pools. They displayed every emotion coursing through her at that moment, and I briefly wondered if she was gazing into the depths of my soul…

I located the source of her laughter. It was a butterfly that had rather comfortable nestled itself upon her dainty fingertip. The pulsing ivory of her frail skin sang to me, and with each thundering beat of her heart, the more my want for her grew exponentially. The heady scent of her enticing blood erupted molten flames throughout my body; the ragged heat tore it's way down my throat, and automatically clouded my judgement. The bloodlust that had overtaken me easily overrode any previous interest she had invoked.. Now the hunter in me savagely pictured tearing out her thumping, crimson heart, to then drink upon the fine wine of her blood.

My instincts had overcome me, and I automatically lunged toward her neck. My mind was far from coherent, and the only thing I was capable of registering was the hot, flowing liquid that was pouring down my throat, calming the fires only slightly - simultaneously screaming, _begging_ me to take more of this nectar, more of this delectable human.

Her heartbeat was erratic now, and did nothing to help her, it only encouraged me. The fear excited me, and I cared not for her life, but was selfishly indulging myself, and I was not capable of stopping.

Until I heard her voice, that is. The pained, gasping for breath, followed by the most pain drenched tone I had ever heard.

"Please, stop." And with that I retracted my teeth…

---

Advice and contstructive criticism would be welcomed, as it's my first attempt at writing in this fandom.


	2. The beast you've made of me

Breathe Me: 'The beast you've made of me.'

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I saw her quivering body, my hands still tangled in her hair, my lips mere inches from her neck as I gazed shell shocked at her pained, and fragile body. Guilt washed over me in astonishing waves of anguished pain, and my chest started throbbing with the immense pressure of the mistake I had made within my blood induced stupor. My grip tightened in her silken locks, and I gazed at her face, so calm, so serene - almost as if she were peacefully slumbering…

Until she wailed for dear life. Her high pitched screech was hoarse and throaty, and I was startled out of my reverie. I immediately lay her down on the floor, the emerald of the grass contrasting with the now sickly white of her sweat sheeted skin as she began to writhe uncontrollably on the dew drenched floor. Her tiny, delicate hands became vulgar and distorted as the tendons underneath her flesh began to rise. He nails dug forcefully into the dirt on the floor beneath her, and the only sound heard was the pained wails of a woman stolen of her life.

My mind, although in a guilt stricken stupor was still functioning, and I knew I had two options to pick in this situation.

My venom was coursing through her veins, contaminating her blood, and poisoning her breathing body, killing every thing; and making it entirely inhuman. She had only a handful of moments before the disease spread to her heart, allowing the inferno of pain to begin scorching her body irreversibly. She would be exactly like me, perfected beyond the basic understanding of the human mind.. Soon, she would be dead, but living, cursed to wander this damned planet without any of her humanity left - no shred of her soul remaining.

I could damn her to a life of eternity alone, or I could snap her frail little neck and end her suffering right now…

I was in a state of panic, and so I picked up her still writhing body, noticing immediately the cooling temperature of her skin, and I automatically made the decision for her when I looked down at her briefly - noticing her chocolate eyes opened and full of nauseating pain and fear. If it were possible my frame would be crumpled on the grass just as this girls was. The heart sinking feeling of committing a sin so unforgivable as this clawed at my dead heart, and I could only bear it and force my legs to sprint toward our current home.

The silence of the forest around was unnerving, and even the howling of the wind screeched ominous warnings into my ears. Like evil lies spewed from the mouth of a demon; my mind kept taunting me, creating morbid images in my head of a dead and broken brunette in my arms with ashen skin and sunken, lifeless eyes.

It seemed this was motivation enough to bring my sprint to unimaginable speeds, and I heard a choked sob from this nameless girl. I let out a dry sob of my own, yet no tears spilled from my honey eyes. Though a painful burning erupted behind my eyes, and a lump grew in my throat.

Nearly a minute had passed since I had began running, and I sighed a crippling sigh when I saw the most welcomed sight I had in a long time.

The white of my house could be seen not far up ahead, and it was mere seconds before I was crashing - quite literally - through one of the many windows within the huge building, directly bringing me within Carlisle's office. He was immediately there, and did not hesitate to take the screeching girl from my arms. Unintelligible sentences spilled from her chapped, damaged lips, the only word that was the slightest bit understandable was fire.

My beauty was burning, and I was entirely to blame. I blinked as Carlisle raced from his office and led her to my bedroom laying her upon my oversized mattress with ease. He calmly looked toward me, the question clear within his glimmering eyes.

"Leave it Carlisle - she's better off one of us than dead and lost forever…" It was selfish of me to act as a God , deciding myself what her fate was. I was also being selfish, because I knew - and although I tried my damn hardest to deny it - that this girl had completely taken over me, from the moment I noticed the glimmering of her silken locks, and the resonating laugh falling from her lips that this woman was more to me that a petty interest.

Again, Carlisle simply nodded, knowing now that words would not be appropriate for this moment. He left silently, and I was overwhelmed by appreciation that he was merely a call away. I knew he would be checking up on her, and I also knew that I was not going to leave her side until she opened her eyes once more.. Until she stopped burning in flames because of me and my repulsive mistake.

My pale hand found hers easily, and I felt the tiniest of tugs upon my own hand. She was aware of my presence, regardless of her current state; and it calmed me too, to know that my being here helped.

Time was lost to me (though I briefly noticed that the sun had already set), and I had yet to move an inch from the space I had been in when I first took her hand. I'd been watching her for goodness knows how long, and although she was still suffering in her own personal hell, I couldn't help but be morbidly fascinated in how pretty she looked in pain. He features contorted into expressions of pure torment, yet her beauty was still clear. Even the screams that resonated against the walls and halls of my home still rang beautifully in my ears.

It was twisted, most certainly, but the changes could already be noticed within her appearance. Her skin was ashen, but not like death, more like smooth and marble. Her hair was a deeper, fuller shade and instead of the sporadic loose curls framing her heart shaped face, her hair now fell upon my pillow in waves of chocolate heaven. Not even a hair was out of place…

Within all of my staring, I'd failed to really notice that I was no longer hearing the wretched screams of an angel in flames. Instead it was silent.

Silent.

No heartbeat.

Nothing.

---

The second I saw her eyelids fluttering I left. I ran away and I shamefully hid myself deep within the thickly wooded area surrounding our home. Once alone I didn't hesitate in allowing my depression to engulf me entirely.

She would no doubt be talking with Carlisle now, if she was capable of composure. Perhaps she was already out on her first hunt… I could just imagine how beautiful she would be dancing through the trees, hunting for her prey, majestic and glorious.

Something I wish she never had to do. It was despicable to have to ruthlessly kill an innocent creature to survive, and in such a savage way. Though at least it wasn't people we were hunting.

But then I realised that it was not our decision to make on whether or not she hunted humans or animals. For all I knew she could be out right now sucking the blood from a human and I'd be blissfully ignorant as to what she would be doing. She could be going on a rampage all over town massacring every living creature she came across with insatiable bloodlust and there would be nothing me, nor the rest of my family could do to stop her.

Even if it was our responsibility, she was a newborn and her strength would outmatch even Emmett. We'd be powerless, and the mere thought of my selfishness ruining everything my family had tried so hard to maintain cut me in ways I'd never thought I'd experience.

It was while I stood within the forest that I realised I had not thought of anything other than that girl. I'd not thought of the difficulties my family are facing without the brunette still being involved, and mostly I'd not even considered how the others may actually be _feeling_ with everything that I'd just caused. I knew Carlisle would not be angry, only immensely disappointed that I'd finally given in to what I truly was: a monster.

He'd never begrudge me it, though. And, being as compassionate as he was, would probably never bring it up with me. I was not deserving of such a beautiful and loving family, and I knew that I am and always will be too selfishly absorbed in my own problems to properly be able to appreciate all that they have done for me.

It's just how I am.

I was ripped out of my stupor when I heard the faintest of exhales from behind me. I turned, though it was too late for me to react, and I found myself forced to the ground painfully by a figure that moved so fast I was genuinely shocked.

Now, it took a lot for me to be both shocked and in pain within the space of half a second. Fortunately - or unfortunately, dependant on your views - my mind added the two together and I surmised that the only thing capable of causing me pain, and moving that fast was one of my own. Also judging my the soft curves pressed against me, this was a female.

I simply stared at her in wonder, incapable of forming any kind of understandable sentence, and I just allowed myself to become transfixed by the elegant, gentle slope of her nose, the round but certainly not plump cheeks and the dazzling ruby shade of her eyes.

It was as I looked into her eyes that I noticed her expression. It was full of heart wrenching pain, anger and overall and extreme sense of hatred that was.. directed toward me? I sighed, not at all surprised by the young girls reaction. I briefly flickered my eyelids closed, waiting for the onslaught of screeching and the flurry of blows I'd be sure to take from this volatile newborn vampire.

"The names Isabella. Seeing as you decided to skip the introductions.." This was something I did not expect, and so I opened my eyes again, to see a sarcastic, and all too fake smile plastered over her -- No, Isabella's face.

"I enjoy reading, writing and I have a huge passion for the English language. My first pet was a leopard gecko called Stripes, my favourite colour is orange and I spend the majority of my time either studying or sleeping… Wait, let me rephrase that last bit.. I _used_ to sleep, I used to rather enjoy it too.. I _also_ have a loving mother and father, but it seems you don't really give a flying fuck about any of that, neither did you even consider it whilst you were chowing down on my neck !"

She didn't have to hit me to hurt me, it seemed. It was enough hearing her angered rant, and it almost broke my heart to hear her voice crack whilst she mentioned her parents. Of course I didn't stop to think of her parents or friends or anything she may have had going for her.

She was stood now, and I was too. I was staring down at her, and although I had a couple of inches on her, I felt positively tiny in her presence.

Her ruby eyes were full of unshed tears, and it was almost as if fate was taunting me, pleading with me to try and hurt this woman that tiny bit more. I always knew I was a monster, just never the extent of it…

"Isabella… It was despicable of me.. Wrong, selfish, vile… I know how difficult it is but I - I'm so very sorry, I'll not ask for forgiveness… Though may I suggest one thing ?" _'Top points for eloquence Rosalie.' _I bitterly thought to myself. Unwittingly, I angrily wondered how this woman dared to have the audacity to speak to me in such a way, but of course I destroyed it as quickly as it came. My self absorbed tendencies were just a part of my personality.

I looked to her, and knew immediately her answer was going to be no, so I interjected. "Go hunting. I'll come and assist, if that's what you'd like…" Of course I knew this was definitely not going to happen, and my dead unbeating heart was withering away simply at the thought of the repercussions my stupid actions had caused. I should've realised she'd react this way, after all I was exactly the same, if not worse. I wouldn't have chosen this life for myself, but now I could genuinely understand Carlisle's actions.

The difference between me and him, however was that he changed me solely to be selfless and save my life. I only chose to let her be changed because once again I was only interested in my own self gain. Either way I'd gotten what I wanted; blood - and I'd foolishly thought that I could have this girl too.

"Yes, I'd not want anything more than to have you suffer with guilt whilst teaching me to be a monster." Her reply shocked me, though I only nodded, keeping my emotions in check and hidden well beneath the exterior I'd put up carefully over the past century.

I'd take her hunting, I'd suffer, but I - Rosalie Hale - would not back down to a challenge. Isabella could very well have her problem with me, that being something I'd not hesitate to accept. I would not, however stand by and let this woman make a fool of me. I saved her life, and I fully intended on having a lengthy discussion with her.

I may feel terrible, but even guilt such as this will never get the best of my pride.

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Thank you for the great feedback. It warms me to think people are enjoying this as much as me. Again, any advice that would help would be accepted very gratefully.

On a side note: I highly recommend that you listen to 'Howl' by Florence + the Machine whilst you read this particular chapter.


	3. I can hear your heartbeat

Breathe Me: I can hear your heartbeat.

I was surprised at the speeds she moved at. Even taking the fact that she was of supernatural origins now, it was still relatively fast even for our kind. I was behind her as she leaped across the dense forestry surrounding the both of us. It was obvious she was still unsure of how to control herself, however, as she continued to pick up her pace, probably not realising the amount of ground she had covered within the past 30 seconds. We had in fact managed to run four miles within that short amount of time, and I found myself smiling slightly. It was almost as if this girl were meant to be one of us.

As contradictory as that was to my musing mere moments ago, I found it to be a very fitting conclusion. She was already gorgeous when the blood was pulsing through her veins but now it seemed as though the speed, grace and unnatural strength she possessed was meant for her. It fit her so perfectly, that if I didn't know any better, I'd say she was an old, old vampire.

I continued thinking, and I pondered why it was that I'd found her in a forest… Why would a human, obviously as frail and breakable as her, be miles into an uncharted, and not entirely mapped out location such as this?

I put that idea into the back of my mind, fully planning on thinking it over more, and perhaps asking her if we ever progressed to civil terms. _'As if I deserve her civility…'_ I quickly ignored that part of my conscience and proceeded to speed myself up. Once I was parallel the brunette, I grabbed her arm as politely as I could, gesturing for her to stop,

She did so, and merely raised an eyebrow at me in question. _'We're definitely not going to be on speaking terms any time soon.'_ I thought as I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear.

"Isabella, it is very important that you follow what I'm saying very carefully. You're a newborn Vampire, and you can easily lose control of yourself.. I'd like you to close your eyes and listen to everything around you. Stretch out your hearing range until you can hear every living thing surrounding you." I saw her close her eyes, and within moments, her form was rigid - even more so than normal - and she opened her flaming ruby eyes, only to dart off at such speeds that I myself could barely see which direction she was heading.

She'd certainly give Edward a challenge. But that of course was not of importance, and so I immediately began tailing her. It was obvious to me that she's found her game, and I knew very well how dangerous it was for me to provoke her whilst she hunted it down. She could easily tear me to shreds, and even my years of experience would not do much to help me if it were to come down to a fight with her. Her strength was much greater than my own, and to be entirely honest I was not particularly up for ripping my clothes.

I had to follow her, of course I did. She could easily expose herself to humans, and it was my duty to make sure she did not end up doing something she would regret once she came to her senses. I did not for one moment think that Isabella was going after a human, after all she managed to not rip me limb from limb when she saw me, and if she was capable of speaking, then surely she'd have some semblance of control. Regardless, I still resumed running after her, picking up on her scent because she was too far emerged into the trees that I could not see her.

Her scent was weakening, and I forced myself to pick up my speed. Unfortunately, as I ran faster, I got closer to her. And it was then the smell of blood hit my nostrils.

Human blood.

"Isabella!" I roared, and I frantically looked around for her. The heady scent of O negative blood made venom pool in my mouth easily, and a spark of flames began licking at my throat. I ignored it however, and continued onward to where I knew Bella was.

Although I was mere moments away from her, by the time I found her, it was far too late.

I found her with her mouth tearing ferociously at some poor hikers neck, and I noticed that he was still alive as she continued savagely draining his life away. It was thrilling to watch, and I disgusted myself as I felt an excited purr escape my throat. My baser instincts told me that this was a beautiful, natural sight, but the side of me that was not savage felt sickened.

The man fell to the floor, limp and lifeless. I looked Isabella in the eyes. I didn't say anything. It was her choice whom she wanted to kill, and I had not right whatsoever to judge her. It's what we are, and if I were to blame her for such a thing then I'd be a fool.

"I just.. Killed…" Her chiming voice broke, and I was immediately by her side.

As I saw her violently heaving and sobbing, all of my negative misconceptions of the woman vanished. She looked to me, and without hesitating, she collapsed into me.

I carefully guided us away from the corpse and sat the both of us down on a log as soon as we were far enough away to not smell the residual blood that was on the mans clothing. I didn't say a word as she mumbled incoherently and sobbed into my chest. My arms stayed securely around her shoulders. I dared not move, just in case she flipped and tried attacking me in her vulnerable state.

It was a few hours before she quieted, and the sun was long gone. The new moon shone dimly in the sky, and the overcast, ebony blanket above us did not look beautiful. It looked just as bittersweet as the woman I was still holding.

"I…" I looked away from her, and I knew immediately that she was going to now blame me for this. It was my fault.. After all, If I'd not have given in to my thirst, she would not have murdered a human being. She was not a hardened, uncaring vampire, she still had the mindset of a human… time had yet to wear down at her morals and human memories.

She was human in everyway apart from her unbeating heart, and I'd destroyed the most precious thing in this world…a soul.

"I'm so very sorry… I understand why you did what you did, now, and I was so, _so_ wrong to blame you. Yes, it was selfish, but before I could not relate to the pull I had on you. I don't know how you managed to stop, honestly I don't.. I am a monster, and it is not you that made me so, but myself…" she trailed off as another heart-wrenching sob tore through her willowy frame.

That was certainly not what I had expected, but I was not going to deny that I was immensely relieved at her apology, regardless of whether or not it was needed.

"Isabella, know that you doing what you did is not your fault. I am entirely to blame, I've had nearly a century to curb my thirst for humans, you have just been changed. The thirst is all consuming within the first few years of your change. Things _will _improve."

She looked to me, and I saw clearly the horror dancing in her eyes. "I don't want to kill people! I don't want to have to murder innocent people just to stay alive! It's vile, and I feel so full of guilt that it feels as though it's going to tear me into two.."

I smiled briefly, though I quickly reigned it in, as I saw a spark of that wonderful temper Isabella possessed, flicker in her eyes. "You don't have to go on killing people to survive.. Perhaps I should have told you of your options before I let you go hunting. The reason I didn't - before you say anything - is because I felt that you were entitled to making your own decisions, and I kind of thought that you'd not appreciate me yapping on for this long whilst your throat was smouldering… Anyway, as I was saying, you don't have to murder for the rest of your life… You can feed off of animals too."

"It's like.. For example, being a vegetarian.. It sustains you, and eases the thirst, but it is not as sating and wonderfully tasting as human blood." I paused and looked toward her, her face was downcast, and she was still slightly shaking. I continued, "My family and I, we're the only group of vampires, apart from our sister coven, whom drinks animal blood. We're seen as strange amongst our kind, but thanks to Carlisle - I assume you've met him - we've managed to live through our existence relatively normally, if that's the appropriate way of describing what we are… Please, do not let your mistake weigh down too heavily on your conscience, Isabella. It's in our nature to -"

"Don't let it weigh on my conscience? How on earth do you expect this to not effect me? I just MURDERED an innocent man whom was minding his own business! His family have now lost a son, a father ! They do not know of his death, and for all I know, he may have children, he may have raised them by himself! And now, due to my despicable nature, he may have children that are going to be left alone! I don't expect you to understand" She spat, her eyes staring directly at me, and I could smell the anger and sorrow pouring off of her. "..After all, you're a monster, you're probably used to the odd 'slip up' here and there! But that's exactly it, isn't it Rosalie, you see it as a mere slip up.. It's murder!"

With that, she ran. _'A monster.. Why does it hurt so much to hear that.. I already knew that was the case…'_

So much for her not getting the best of me. This woman was full of surprises, surprises that left me rather short on what to do. I repeated the words in my head that she had just said to me.

'_A monster.'_

'_I am a monster.'_

Thank you, again for being so supportive. I had a slight bit of trouble with this chapter, but fear not! LOL. The next update is already being written, so it shouldn't take too long for me to get it to you.

As I've said previously, if there is anything you believe needs improving, don't hesitate in letting me know.


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